Saturday 11 July 2009

Job application...

What with Gail going out to work again and all that, I think it's time that I made some contribution to household expenses, so this week I have decided to apply for a job.....

Dear High Heid Yin of Scottish Tourism,

I would like to apply for the (as yet unadvertised) position of Special Canine Ambassador for the Scottish Tourist Industry. I feel fully confident that I have the skills necessary to promote our magnificent country to potential visitors from overseas, for the following reasons:
  • Over the past year, my blog about life in Scotland ( has attracted an international following on the 'dogs with blogs' network, and many readers have commented on the beauty of our landscape, which, as you can see from the photo montages below, is much enhanced if a good-looking dog (i.e. me) is prepared to pose in the foreground.

  • As a relatively elderly citizen, I have much wisdom to impart, but I can also honestly claim that my enthusiasm for exploring new places is undiminished, my appetite for investigating and writing about our mountains, lochs, forests, beaches, parks, castles, historic cities, knows no bounds (so long as the ground surface is gentle on the paws of course...)
  • I consider myself a dog of high integrity, but I am also aware that the role of ambassador does require a degree of tact, so please rest assured that in the course of my duties, I would be willing to, how shall we put it, draw a veil over some of the less attractive aspects of life in this part of the world. It really is not necessary to draw attention to our unique insect population is it? And the undeniable dampness of our climate can be presented in a positive light as beneficial to the skin tones of folk of a certain age. We need not let on that deep fried pizza is a more popular dish than our finest wild salmon...
  • I can expound at great length on the exceptionally dog-friendly nature of our country, which will surely appeal to many potential visitors. How many people know that on Scotrail trains, the staff often carry around special supplies of shortbread to feed travelling pooches? Have you heard about the delicatessen in Auchterarder that offered me a little ice-cream cone, FREE, to go with the big one sold to my human? I could go on.
  • I recognise that some visitors will have a certain (misguided, in my view) expectations about tartan wearing, bagpipe playing and that sort of thing, and I shall be prepared, as I hope is clear from the photo at the head of this letter, to pander to these notions of Scottishness, but only provided that a clearly defined nutritional incentive programme is in place....
Should you require further confirmation of my qualifications for the ambassador position, I shall be pleased to supply references from my many friends in the USA and beyond, who will I am sure attest to my capacity to present our country as a delightful place to visit. 

I look forward to your prompt response,

Yours faithfully,
Hamish Westie,

Do you think I'm in with a chance?


Maxmom said...

Hey there, Hamish.

mmmmm... You present an irresistable argument for being THE Ambassador to your wonderful country! You are an absolute cert ol' lad!...and the 'pontification' is excellent! They won't be able to resist you!

Here's an idea...Maybe you and I can go into business...I'll push my South AFrican buddies your way and you can send the Scots here? (Not sure they'll cope with our hot climate though???)

Just one you eat Haggis?? Eish, my mom gets queazy with that stuff. How would your mom cope with our 'Boerewors' and 'Biltong'? But I'm sure us dogs will manage.

Good luck with your application dear Hamish.

Regards, Maxdog
ps...On second thoughts, perhaps it's time for us old dogs to retire???...Im beginning to feel my age.

Stella said...

Alright, Hamish, alright! This is a perfect employment for you and while I suspect it might be sort of part-time, it would be just right for you. You could have newspaper articles (with your picture of course), television spots, ah, I can see it all now. Do you remember a TV series with Robert Carlyle where he had a Westie named Wee Jock, I think it was called Hamish MacBeth. You would be perfect in a role like that. (By the way if you ever run into Robert Carlyle, my Mom would like his audograf, she just loves him.)

Oh, well, I've gone on too long, but I do get excited for my friends. See what your good letter brings!


ScrapsofMe said...

Brilliant! A most excellent idea! I think the tourism board will snap you up immediately, even if the ambassadorship doesn't materialize. You could do articles about traveling Scotland with dogs, dog friendly B&B's and self catering places, the best dog walks and parks, and of course, the best deep fried pizza places. Yummmers. Let's not forget dog friendly pubs so the tall people can have a pint or two. My peeps said they next time they go to Scotland I can go if they can find a place that's ok with dogs. Maybe I'll find a guy in a kilt, my own true love. Bonnie...wee scottie lassie.

the magic sleigh said...

The job is yours! I LOVE those pictures of the scenery with you in the forefront. Stunning, baby!
-Kira The BeaWootiful

TwoSpecialWires said...

Hamish, after reading your very articulate and impressive application, we can't imagine anything but that the Scottish Doggie Resource Department will hire you sight unseen for the (as yet unadvertised) position of Special Canine Ambassador for the Scottish Tourist Industry. We assume this will come with an ample sign on bonus. But, in the event we can help as references, we would be honored and thrilled. We're just not sure we can be quite so articulate. Your application was truly amazing!

Duly impressed,
Jake and Fergi

Rocky Creek Scotties and Rocky Creek Ramblings said...

Our Dear Hamish,

We think you would make a wonderful ambassador for your country. If you need a reference, have the 'powers that be' contact us - we'll give you a glowing report (and we're Scottish too!!).

Lilly, Piper, Carrleigh and Java

Martha said...

Hi Hamish
Of course you are the perfect dog for the job - there is no question about that at all.
You enhance the pictures of Scotland for us every time! No mountain, loch or beach has ever looked so good as when you adorn it!
We would be happy to talk to the Tourist Board on your behalf.
What you have, which is also essential, is a true understanding of the Scottish culture.
We could see that in your appreciation of Rab C in our Midge video!
I see you intend to overlook that slight obstacle to tourism - although you could instead hand every tourist a bottle of Avon skin so soft which seem to work well!
After all you do want the tourists to return.
You appreciation of the traditional scottish diet would also be an essential component of your job.
We loved your suggestions for a nice traditional meal for Martha - the deep fried Mars Bar most of all.
You may have to sign a disclaimer re potential heart problems any tourists may incur during their cultural experience!
Thanks for tipping us the paw about the free ice cream in Auchterarder - that makes a visit there essential for us.
Have a great weekend.
Martha & Bailey xx

Lucia said...

Ciao bello Hamish!

Awwww, Hamish -- you're a shoo-in for the job. You have the wisdom, the wit and the winsome ways to win over the whole wide world. (Ah, a little alliteration...!!)

Deep-fried pizza??? (Mmmmmm -- pizzzzzza...) Do tell!!

Tanti baci!

tammy said...

Hamish you are a most handsome Westie, you would be a wonderful
picture of Scotland. I would hire you in a hearbeat!

karensbrae said...

You could take over the world!!

The Animal Doctor said...

I saw your blog from Maxdog. If I only have a passport and a visa, I'd go to Scotland and South Africa. You and Maxdog make for a good ambassador of your respective countries. I hope you get the job.

Pee-Ess: I hope the Scottish Tourism does not have a height requirement for ambassadors?

hoping to be your friend, Trudis

Unknown said...

You left out that you're an excellent golfer, give grand tours of whisky distilleries and had a pivotal role in the international sensation Beagadoon.

Not to mention a high level of tolerance for Americans!

Your pal,


P.S. Eric is arranging the bachelor party. Don't be surprised to find yourself in attendance!

The Black and Tans. said...

Hamish you would definitely secure the job of that we have no doubt.

Good luck.

Molly, Taffy and Monty

Asta said...

I think you should easily be a shoo in fow this position. I think you would be a pawfect Ambassadow..I know You have cewtainly tempted and convinced me and my pawents that you live in a blissfully pawfect place. If we evew have any money again, we would love nothing mowe than to come see youw bootiful countwy. Youw enthoosiasm, and chawm , and vast expewience all make you THE ideal Candidate fow this job!

I hope it pays well and doesn't take up too much of youw fun time
smoochie kisses

Ziggy Stardust said...

Hi Hamish, I am Sasha from Michigan in the USA. I saw a photo of your handsome self at the stag party and thought perhaps we could be friends. I read over your resume and I can't imagine why you would not be suitable for the position. Good luck, I will check back for updates.

licks and sniffs, Sasha

Baby Rocket Dog and Hootie said...

Fer sure!!! You most definately should be hired as the Canine Ambassador for Scotland.

Our Mommy is all the time saying she wants to travel to Scotland when Pop retires...probably all the subliminal messages you send out from your blog!

XXOO-Your Ardent Admirer, BabyRocketDog